As the end of the year creeps up on us and the dawn of a new day approaches it’s time we look back on the events that occurred in 2014. The things that were said, the crazes we obsessed over and most importantly which Kardashian got the most hits on google [insert sarcasm here]. One way I like to reminisce is by remembering what hits I played the most depending on the context I was in. Ok not really but I needed an idea for an article and this just came to me so just fucking deal with it ok? Thanks.
I present to you my ruling on 2014’s Best Hit To…. List:
…Get Over Bad Shit Happening: Chandelier
Ah Sia. You came, threw a blonde bob on a 12 year old contemporary dancer and made America feel again. Then you refused to show your face after everyone already knew what you looked like so it kind of left us all a bit puzzled but we let it slide cus, girl, that song is just too damn YAASSS BISH.
…Get Excited About the Weekend: Happy
This was Pharrell’s long overdue (?) comeback and let’s face it he pretty much nailed it. GIRL has gotten critical and commercial success and there’s no denying literally every single person on the planet has been getting down to Happy at one point or another. It even caused never-aging (seriously NEVER THO) Williams to shed some tears after seeing people’s reaction to the hit. Oprah made a vampire cry ladies and gentlemen.
…Twerk to: Anaconda
I think there might only be me and maybe 5 other people who haven’t tried to twerk to this song. No wait I lie, there was that one weekend in Toronto…Regardless, Nicki Minaj was just like “excuse me while I break the internet (sorry Kim) like it’s no biggie”. She took a beloved single from the 90’s and made it new again. I personally don’t listen to Nicki but the twerking force really is strong with this one.
…Listen to while stoned: Kaleidoscope Love
This was a PACKED year for Montreal’s favorite DJ next door Kaytranada. The newcomer has really made a name for himself and was definitely the go to music to put on when I was lost in space on public transit. It’s always exciting to see Montreal names get recognized overseas so fingers crossed Kaytra only keeps going up from here.
…Feel Yourself to: Tuesday
You know EXACTLY what i’m talking about. It’s 2AM, you’re wondering if you can stomach one last shot and suddenly it starts playing. This random overnight hit due to a touch of Drake brought Atlanta rapper ILoveMakonnen success it would’ve normally taken him a while to achieve. You can literally dance to the track however the heck you’d like which is great for those nights you’ve lost all hand eye coordination due to too much Sailor Jerry. Honorable mention to Rae Sremmurd’s No Flex Zone.
…Act like a Diva: 7/11
I was going to give this honor to Drunk In Love but since the track was released in 2013 i decided to go for Bey’s latest single. And very obviously this award can only be given to a Beyonce song because I can guarantee you that whenever a girl (or even dude) is feeling their most postin up flawless while dancing it’s because Queen B is jamming. Now bow down bitches.
…Party in the Summer: Habits (Stay High)
It came, it saw, it concurred, and now I really can’t stand hearing it, omg please make it stop. Swedish sensation Tove Lo can consider the year won with her smash that made everyone want to stay out partying even though they had work the next day. This song probably caused one night stands, bar fights and inappropriately timed puking in the midst of our debauchery we called summer 2014. Sigh, cherish the memories folks.
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Disclaimer: some songs came out in 2013. For those of you who are mad i didn’t follow the rules: get bent.